Accepting the Good and Bad During Chemotherapy

One of the joys I experience every morning when I wake up is seeing the flowers in my neighbor’s gardens. There are beautiful rhododendrons, hydrangeas, iris, lavender, daylilies, coneflowers, roses and many others. And before these flowers appeared, there were fragrant lilacs and peonies! Being able to smell the fresh scent of the flowers was an extra bonus last month. I said to myself, “If you have to be traveling to chemotherapy, there’s nothing better than being able to look out of the car window and see the magnificent array of flowers to delight my heart. If that doesn’t put a smile on my face, I don’t know what will!”I love flowers and they have always touched my soul deeply! I’m sure I developed that love from working with my maternal grandmother in her flower garden as a little boy.

Catch up on Chester’s previous story: A Caring Oncologist and the Power of Prayerful Friends

The other thing about going to chemotherapy for my chronic lymphocytic leukemia is being greeted by the receptionist, nurse and phlebotomist. On my last visit, I noticed a man bringing in a flower arrangement with his wife. I heard her ask her husband, “Is she here?” He said, “Yes.” Then he approached the receptionist and presented her with a flower arrangement. She was surprised and deeply moved by his gesture. I said to myself that the flowers must be a tribute to her for her positive attitude, patience, and compassion when dealing with patients because those are the attributes I had observed in her myself. When I finished my chemo and checked out, I noticed another man following me. He spent about a half hour talking with her, sharing his cancer journey. I watched as she listened attentively and responded with concern and empathy. This confirmed my thinking about her receiving the flowers earlier from a patient.

Little things like this get us through the day. All of us want to have someone to talk to and sometimes the receptionist is the only person able to lend an ear. This is why I write to share my journey with you, so you can be a part of my experience. I hope you can feel what I feel, and if I have joy and hope, I want to impart those feelings to you. One of my friends told me to pray for others when I feel pain. That’s what I do. So, these reflections are my prayer for you to be inspired, to share my gratitude and to rejoice with me.

Another joy I want to share is my discovery of a Good Will Store in the city. I was finally able to get some clothes that fit me. Now, I don’t look like a baggy old man. I have clothes that fit me! Yay! I look normal

again, like a proper senior citizen.

So, how are things with me? It appears I spoke too soon about not needing insulin. Yesterday, my primary physician told me that one side effect of chemotherapy would be to increase in my blood glucose levels.

Unfortunately, it has reached such a dangerous level that I must inject myself with insulin. Yuck! I really didn’t want to get to this point!

Second, I’ve been taking Ozempic (semaglutide), which has taken a toll on me regarding my weight loss, so my primary care physician is changing Ozempic to Trulicity (dulaglutide). He says this medication will help lower my blood glucose level. However, Trulicity also has a side effect of decreasing my appetite, along with causing me to feel tired and weak. According to my oncologist, all this was possible at the beginning of treatment. We just didn’t expect it so soon. Everything seems compounded at this point.

Is there any good news? Yes, indeed!

My primary care physician said I could eat more to put on weight. Yay! He said my white blood cell count is improving at a snail’s pace, but at least it is happening. My red blood cell count has normalized. I am happy about all of these changes.

The bad news is that my platelet count went down. It is now back to 30.So, the doctor is adjusting my medication. We are between a rock and a hard place. The medicine that is helping me is also hurting my blood glucose level. So, now I have to walk a delicate balance. The medication is being adjusted, so we will see what happens.

This was not a good day! My blood pressure was low. Normally, I am fine because I always meditate before they take my blood pressure. I got dizzy on my way to the bathroom and the nurse had to support me. It was a terrible day! The nurse who put in my IV had to take it out after a while because my arm started to swell. She tried again but decided to get another nurse to put in the IV. We switched from my left arm, where I normally had the IV, to the right arm. The new nurse was very careful and got this one in OK. I have great veins but she wasn’t able to use the upper part of my arm because they had just taken blood from that area. So, she used a vein on the top of my right hand. I hate when they have to insert the IV there because it is always a painful position to have an IV tube. But I dealt with it and let it be.

I am disappointed and frustrated, but I soldier on. I will hope for better

results next time with the changes that have been made. Life is all about

change and accepting it as best we can.

One of the members of my Quaker community brought dinner for us tonight. It was delicious and a great way to end the horrible day. My heart is filled with gratitude for my friends.

This post was written and submitted by Chester Freeman. The article reflects the views of Freeman and not of CURE®. This is also not supposed to be intended as medical advice.

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