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Brenda Denzler is a writer and editor living in North Carolina. She received her doctorate from Duke University and worked as an editor at UNC-Chapel Hill before she was diagnosed with inflammatory breast cancer in 2009. Since then, she has devoted a great deal of her time and energy to understanding and writing about cancer, cancer treatment and the impact of pre-existing PTSD on the ability of doctors to give and patients to receive medical treatment.
A cancer survivor dedicates two spirited poems to living 12 years post-cancer.
The Twelve Years of Blessings
On the last day of June in two thousand and nine
A cancer diagnosis was mine.
Here I am, 12 years later, a survivor (for now),
And I think “Holy Cow!”
In my mind.
“What has happened, good and bad?
Am I happy? Am I sad?”
More like “ambivalent,” I’m guessing.
Gratefully alive, yet unable to thrive,
For treatment’s a backhanded blessing.
So in the spirit of “12”
I’ve decided to delve
Into the story of what has occurred.
I won’t leave you guessing —
It’s an account of the blessings
That treatment produced in my world.
The Twelve Years in Remission
(to the tune of the Twelve Days of Christmas)
In the 1st year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me
The tingling of neuropathy.
In the 2nd year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me
My first baby grandson,
And the tingling of neuropathy.
In the 3rd year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And the tingling of neuropathy.
In the 4th year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
Another lovely grandson!
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And the tingling of neuropathy.
In the 5th year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
Dis-a-bil-i-ty!
Another lovely grandson!
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And the tingling of neuropathy.
In the 6th year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
Bone-crushing fatigue,
Thus the dis-a-bil-i-ty!
Another lovely grandson!
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And the tingling of neuropathy.
In the 7th year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
A chainsaw accident
From the bone-crushing fatigue,
Thus the dis-a-bil-i-ty!
Another lovely grandson!
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And the tingling of neuropathy.
In the 8th year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
Helping a friend through cancer,
A chainsaw accident
From the bone-crushing fatigue,
Thus the dis-a-bil-i-ty!
Another lovely grandson!
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And the tingling of neuropathy.
In the 9th year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
A third wonderful grandson,
Helping a friend through cancer,
A chainsaw accident
From the bone-crushing fatigue,
Thus the dis-a-bil-i-ty!
Another lovely grandson!
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And the tingling of neuropathy.
In the 10th year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
A new DVT (with PE),
A third wonderful grandson,
Helping a friend through cancer,
A chainsaw accident
From the bone-crushing fatigue,
Thus the dis-a-bil-i-ty!
Another lovely grandson!
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And worsening neuropathy.
In the 11th year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
Back-to-back concussions,
A new DVT (with PE),
A third wonderful grandson,
Helping a friend through cancer,
A chainsaw accident
From the bone-crushing fatigue,
Thus the dis-a-bil-i-ty!
Another lovely grandson!
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And ever-worse neuropathy.
In the 12th year post-cancer, my treatments gave to me,
Alpha-gal from tick bites,
Back-to-back concussions,
A new DVT (with PE),
A third wonderful grandson,
Helping a friend through cancer,
A chainsaw accident
From the bone-crushing fatigue,
Thus the dis-a-bil-i-ty!
Another lovely grandson!
A new drinking habit (coffee!),
My first baby grandson,
And pretty bad neuropathy!
<<jazz hands here>>
(Don’t forget lymphedema!)
And pret-ty bad neur-o-pa-thyyyyy!
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