Jane Biehl is a 12-year survivor of a very rare form of blood cancer, known as myelodysplastic syndrome (MDS). She has enjoyed several exciting careers including a librarian, counselor, teacher, and writer. She loves to write about surviving cancer, overcoming hearing loss and the wonderful benefits of having a hearing-ear service dog.

Jane Biehl Ph.D.

As a child and now an adult I remember an oft-repeated quote, “The only constant is change.” The older I get, the truer this is. As an elderly person, I feel like I can’t keep up. I grew up in an era where, in the evenings, we would sit on our front porch and visit neighbors and friends to keep cool because of no air conditioning. 

Now in the computer digital age, we are on our tablets getting digital news, Facebook, Instagram and 24-hour broadcasts on television. Our phones pop up with the latest news and we feel forced to read it. We feel guilty for not being active all the time and keep receiving articles on how to make the best use of our time. We are always in a hurry, but I often ask myself where I’m going and why I’m rushing. Keeping up with the newest technology is nearly impossible for anyone, but especially for older people. 

Tim Tincher wrote an article called “Smartphone usage surges 13% in 2024.” His data showed that between smartphones, television, tablets and computers, the average American spends 16 hours and 10 minutes on devices. Millennials and Gen Z spend more than six hours per day on their phones. No wonder they become experts on these devices! I feel inadequate daily because I do not know how to use these devices to save time. I have been extremely frustrated working on my latest book and what I do not know.

Traffic in the city and driving in fast lanes are difficult for me. Everyone seems to be in a hurry and it is impossible for me to keep up. It takes me longer to get ready to go anywhere than it used to. I remember my parents complaining about being slow and now I understand it!

Cancer changes our lives even more. We have to slow down, we feel fatigued easily and we spend hours with doctors, in hospital waiting rooms or getting treatments. My friends my age often brag about getting up early and talk about all they can do in one day. With the fatigue from my myelodysplastic syndrome (MDS), I am forced to stop and take frequent breaks to rest.

How do I cope with this? I have days I do not schedule anything, not even going grocery shopping. I get up when I feel like it. I sip coffee and read my books. I take my dog for a walk and enjoy the sights. Sometimes I go to a local coffee shop and sit on the patio. I refuse to hurry. Sometimes I do not even write! Sometimes I binge-watch “NCIS” on the television. It is not often enough but I do it whenever I can.

Yes, we are all inundated with change and the digital world. And it is OK to slow ourselves down. No one else will do it for us. The wonderful thing is when we go back to being busier, we feel more rested and energetic. We can control our lives and our clock and are healthier for it!

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With my myelodysplastic syndrome and age, I find it hard to keep up; however, cancer and fatigue have taught me to live at my own pace. 

In a World of Rushing, Cancer Taught Me to Slow Down 

I am amazed at people who are warriors of cancer and still worry about being old. I have a friend who is a true and valiant survivor. She had breast cancer, severe lymphedema and terrible side effects for years. She still goes to work and sojourns on.

Imagine my surprise when she said that she didn’t want anyone at work to know how old she was. I told her I appreciated every single day as a gift and was so grateful. (Spoiler: I am older than she is).

She stated that she was grateful, but just did not want to be looked at as elderly. Granted, she was older than most of her coworkers, but I was still stunned. I realized then that each one of us reacts differently to what we learn from cancer. I have often said cancer is a tough teacher, especially after having myelodysplastic syndrome (MDS). I have learned not to obsess over the little things like age and to be more thankful. She learned to be tough and valiant but still worried about the perception of age. I thought, then, that we all learn different lessons. Many people would say my obsession with finishing my book and spending years on getting it published was stupid, considering I could be doing a lot of things and enjoying myself more. We each choose what is important to us and honor that. We each have our secret fears.

What right did I have to think she should not worry about age? It is not up to me to judge. The more I thought about this, I realized that a lot of this is due to our society and how we are portrayed in the media. Ageism is rampant in our society. People in other cultures often revere their elderly but the U.S. does not do that. The definition of ageism is “Discrimination against older people because of negative and inaccurate stereotypes.” It is so ingrained we do not even realize we are doing it.

Retired people are often looked down on as not contributing to our society. Many of us are behind in our knowledge of technology. I did not begin to use it until age 40 and preschoolers now use it both at school and home! There is a learning curve! Yet, many people my age are working part-time, taking care of grandchildren and enjoying life. We are in book clubs, we travel and we enjoy life. I have 90-year-old friends who still have so much to teach me at age 73. Their wisdom cannot be replaced.

Please do not think I am bashing younger people. I say constantly that I do not know how they do it. They work, go to school or both. They have fears about violence in the schools I never faced. With all the social media including Instagram, X, Facebook, websites and the usage of tablets, kindles, computers and more. They are juggling a constant influx of information with few if any breaks. They are facing uncertain political events, bullying on social media, and problems adults never dreamed of. And most of them are really good people. But elderly people have a lot to offer too.

Add this to the stereotype of cancer. Fortunately, due to tons of research and new treatments, it is no longer considered a fatal disease. But people do look at us differently if they know we have it. So many of us are battling both the stereotype of cancer and aging.

It is my hope that with the new “elderly” and the lessening of the stigma of cancer, future generations will not feel the need to hide their age. After all, we are survivors and need to be loud and proud of that!

Having myelodysplastic syndromes has taught me to cherish every day and to pursue the things that matter to me, like publishing a book I’ve been writing.

My Worries About Being Old as an MDS Survivor

One of the problems in the United States is our infatuation with body image.

This obsession with looks was demonstrated by what happened to Simone Biles in the Olympics. She is one of the most talented gymnasts in the world and has accomplished performances no one else ever has. No one except another athlete can appreciate the years of practice, grueling pain and sacrifices she has made. And what did the fans complain about? Her hair!

She had the perfect response on Instagram when she said, “Don’t come for me about my hair. IT WAS DONE but [the] bus has NO AC andit’s like 9000 degrees…oh and a 45-min. ride.” The point is that the criticism never should have happened in the first place.

Years ago, I read that the average stars attending the Oscars spend over eight hours getting ready. When we are going out the door, none of us have that kind of time. Yet many people emulate the stars and want to look like them. Teenagers try to imitate the beauty. I blame the media for a lot of this phenomenon.

For people diagnosed with cancer, how we look is an issue. Many people have surgeries and feel disfigured. Lymphedema can require bandages that are large and unsightly. Hair loss is devastating to many people. With a blood cancer like mine, my body image is not altered, but I often look pale and have big shadows under my eyes from the fatigue.

I also am saddened by the lack of self-confidence in our society, which often goes along with the obsession with body image.

I worked for several years counseling children who were being fostered and adopted. I would ask each of them at the end of a session to tell me five good things about themselves. I do not remember even one giving me an answer without my prompting. I would remind them that they were polite to me, put away their toys and mention other positive actions to get them started. They sometimes picked up on that and began to think of other things on their own. I would have adult clients who would berate themselves repeatedly. I would ask them if they ever said the negative things to their friends that they said to themselves. They would reply “of course not”, and I would just look at them and ask why they did it to themselves. They would get the point.

What does this all have to do with cancer? There are so many things we cannot do after treatments and side effects. My confidence level has definitely plunged. Because of the risk of infection, I have given up cruises, have lots less energyand have to limit my activities. My hearing loss makes me afraid to say something stupid in public, and I avoid large crowds. Losing my teeth has affected my appearance and I am afraid to smile. I think every one of us has a story to tell.

I try to cope with both my appearance problems and my lack of self-confidence by giving myself little pep talks. I may look pale, but makeup helps.I apply lipstick when I feel I need makeup. With my appearance, a pretty dress or suit can make all the difference. I am letting my hair grow longer for a brand-new hairstyle. I can’t go on long walks, but I can do short ones. I can’t travel as much but can write more. I can’t go on cruises but can take driving trips. Each little mantra I tell myself, each little positive gesture I generate, makes me feel better. Yes, it makes just a little tiny bit of difference, but that may be all any of us need!

Cancer has changed my self-image, but I’ve learned a few tricks to help boost my self-confidence. 

The Importance of Self-Image With Cancer

The Olympics fascinate me for many reasons. I watch in awe as the athletes who have trained every single day for four years or longer run faster than deer, swim faster than fish and jump higher than humanly possible. They twist and turn their bodies by doing somersaults. The relay teams have to cooperate in swimming and diving events to win while the teamwork in basketball, soccer and track has to be impeccable. And that is just a few of the sports.

wrote a blog comparing the contenders and winners

 of the events to those of us fighting cancer and talking about both being warriors.

This time I see another similarity. The athletes and announcers both mention how the best athletes in the world need to know their bodies thoroughly. The racers must keep “gas in the tank” to go over the finish line. Each athlete has to decide which events they compete the best for track, swimming and many other sports. The gymnasts know every inch of their bodies so they can twist, turn, somersault and grab the bars at the exact second because they could risk serious injury if they don’t.

Those of us with cancer also learn to be in touch with our bodies. I can tell from my energy level whether my blood counts are up or down. Sometimes a simple sore throat tells me I need to get more sleep before I land in bed completely. I do not have to look up the pollen counts to see if it is high or low.

We also need to communicate with our doctors. Recently, I had an appointment with my primary care physician but when I arrived, I found out they canceled my appointment. The receptionist was very nervous and defensive. She told me they had tried to call me, but I told her my phone voicemail was not working. She scheduled my next appointment, and then I asked about my blood work. I noticed some numbers flagged in red on the patient portal. I explained that I needed to find out about this and when the blood work was to be administered again. She haughtily replied, “And how do you know about these numbers?” I told her I had cancer (myelodysplastic syndrome; MDS) and kept careful track of all of them. She finally called the nurse practitioner, who told me that my thyroid was underactive and I needed to go on increased dosages. If I had not pursued this, I do not know what would have happened. If we do not monitor other health problems, the cancer can become worse. I try not to obsess over my health unnecessarily, but I do know how important it is to evaluate my blood tests and how I feel.

We trust our doctors but they cannot always stay on top of hundreds of patients. They need our help. We have to self-advocate and assume some responsibility. The Olympic champions go through years of training, but ultimately, it is up to them to win or lose. Cancer survivors are similar to Olympians both because we are warriors, but it is up to us to stay in tune with our bodies. Doing that is never a bad thing for anyone!

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Just like athletes in the Olympics, it's important for cancer survivors to keep track of everything they feel and to know their bodies well. 

Jane Biehl Ph.D.

In a World of Rushing, Cancer Taught Me to Slow Down

My Worries About Being Old as an MDS Survivor

The Importance of Self-Image With Cancer

Cancer Survivors and Olympians Need to Be in Tune With Their Bodies

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