Barbara Tako is a breast cancer survivor (2010), melanoma survivor (2014) and author of Cancer Survivorship Coping Tools—We'll Get You Through This. She is a cancer coping advocate, speaker and published writer for television, radio and other venues across the country. She lives, survives, and thrives in Minnesota with her husband, children and dog. See more at www.cancersurvivorshipcopingtools.com,or www.clutterclearingchoices.com.

Barbara Tako

A long-term cancer survivor shares her tips on getting through the winter cold that bites a little extra for survivors and patients with cancer.

I would not have made a good pioneer on the prairie. I appreciate modern luxuries, like long hot showers, heat and air-conditioning. Cold bothers me. Heat sometimes does too. My neuropathy toes and my reconstructed breasts don’t heat themselves! Frankly, after cancer the weather, especially if it is cloudy, windy and cold, seems to bother me even more. 

As a ten-year cancer survivor, I have learned to deal, and you may be surprised by some of my methods:

Over the years, my mechanical problem-solving husband has taught and demonstrated to me the importance of good equipment. Bad weather requires good equipment. I am talking about outdoor boots or shoes that keep you plenty warm and dry and have good traction, so you won’t slip on the ice. The same idea applies to hats, gloves, and coats. I like polar fleece headbands that can keep my ears warm but will not completely flatten my hair.

I also like waterproof gloves that have good grips on the palms and fingers. Some gloves even have an opening to let out just my fingertips. As for coats, I like the kind that can zip all the way up to my chin and come with a warm hood—just in case. Good winter shoes and clothing are not cheap, but please consider them to be a worthwhile and an important investment in your health.

Since cancer treatment, which included hormone treatment and a prophylactic hysterectomy, I don’t just get cold, I get hot. I am talking about frequent and intense hot flashes that actually have gotten better over time—I am talking years since treatment here, not weeks or months.

The best way I have found to cope with hot flashes or cold flashes are layers, layers that can easily come off or on. For me, this means a zippered top layer that blocks the wind, polar fleece vests with zippers and sweaters that either have a great big neck, a zipper or large easy buttons that I can quickly get undone. I have come to accept that layers come with the territory of survivorship after treatment for cancer is through.

You may choose to suffer quietly instead of interrupting the people around you, but don’t be afraid to move. Sometimes during a hot flash, I go to the basement or step outside briefly. I head out the door into the cooler garage or I stand on the step outside the front door, whatever it takes for a few moments. If I am getting too cold, it helps me to go by a heat vent or to move around the room a bit to improve my circulation. Don’t feel like a burden or distraction to anyone in these moments, do what you need to do to handle these moments of discomfort.

As soon as I stepped out into the cold to walk the dog, or to go to my car, or head into a store or restaurant, the rant would begin, “Ugh, I hate the cold. This is horrible. The wind cuts right through me.” I had to change that message to myself in order to cope more positively.

Now it is something like “This is okay. The cold reminds me that I am alive and here. Being reminded that I am still alive and here is a great thing.” Dead people are not bothered by the cold, so for me, maybe the cold really is not such a bother after all? It’s all about your perspective, the one thing you can find a way to control.

For more news on cancer updates, research and education, don’t forget to

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How To Handle The Cold (And Heat) During and After Cancer

After almost twelve years together, our healthy, perfect-weight, exercised-daily dog who was estimated to live to fifteen based on her breed, was gone in six days. Ultrasounds and x-rays had found cancer tumors in both her kidneys, as well as her spleen, and lungs. She abruptly left four devastated people behind—me, my husband and our two grown daughters. Why cancer? Why so fast? Why no real treatment options? Here are the painful pet cancer lessons that we learned.

Animals, including beloved family pets, hide their illness. Pets often won’t blatantly show their symptoms until cancer has progressed too far to successfully treat. Look for subtle changes and get your furry friend checked out right away. Do not assume that changes are age-related.

Our dog started growling when we would lift her up. We were thinking it was age-related grumpiness, but we now realize she may have been having abdominal discomfort.

Our dog was not as cuddly with us. She would move to the other end of the couch and stretch out more. Again, she was probably having abdominal pain rather than becoming less social than she had always been with us.

Our dog was sometimes a little off her food and we thought, okay, let’s ask the vet and maybe there is better food to use and maybe some supplements for her? That was when we found the cancer. Her cancer pain was probably affecting her eating.

Our dog began to go off and hide in a small bathroom or tuck her head under someone’s bedspread instead of hanging out with us. We thought she was just tired. She may have been trying to find a “safe” place because her instincts were telling her she was no longer well enough to defend herself.

Consider biopsying “normal” fatty lumps

Nine times out of ten, these lumps are nothing other than harmless fatty cysts, however, the lump might be the early stage of removable cancer. If you are the owner of a pet with cancer, you and your pet will be glad to catch and treat it early.

Early detection is key for early treatment and improved survival. If our family had caught the cancer when it was only in one kidney (where the largest tumor was), removing the tumor before the cancer had metastasized to the other kidney, spleen, and lungs could have extended our dog’s life.

They can’t talk to you. Our dog Mitzi was raised by all four of us. She had a unique relationship with each of us. She was intuitive. We were her pack. My husband and I treated her more like the youngest child than as the pet. Mitzi was fifth in a series of sometimes overlapping pets that we have shared our home with over the past thirty-three years. She connected with the four people even after our two grown children left the nest. Her pre-mature death leaves one dead and four wounded behind. Our home hasn’t been this empty since before we got married over thirty-three years ago.

If one person who reads this goes on to follow these suggestions to extend the life and quality of life for their pet, then writing this article through my tears will have been well worth it. And well, Mitzi would approve too, I know she would.

A two-time cancer survivor loses her wonderful dog to, of course, cancer and offers advice to avoid some pet cancer pitfalls.

Lessons on Pet Cancer From a Cancer Survivor

I just read about a breed of dog that can be unforgiving. If you make one mistake, in this dog’s mind, you are out—down for the count. I think I want a breed of dog that can be more forgiving. All my previous dogs forgave my foolish mistakes with them and gave me unconditional love regardless of my human faults.

I want to think that I have learned about myself and my short-comings from my cancer experiences as well as each dog I have had in thirty-three plus years. Cancer or not, slowly, I try to become a better human. Don’t we all? Isn’t that especially important this year while coping with cancer, COVID-19, and the holiday season?

Here are 4 tips to better yourself to help balance cancer, COVID-19 and the holiday season:

Remember that we all matter, each and every one of us.

A friend of mine recently confessed that she would not want to go see a marriage counselor with her spouse during a short rough patch because then they each would have to face their faults and be told about the mistakes each of them had made. This surprised me.

I mean, I am totally a mistake-making human 

 I believe we each owe it to the people around us to work on becoming the best human we can be. When we own our mistakes, there is then this amazing opportunity to change and do better. I am pretty sure my friend tries to be the best person she can be in all of her relationships except maybe the one she has with herself—she can be too hard on herself. Are you too hard on yourself?

We can rewire our thinking and therefore our behaviors.

Some thought tracks in the brain turn into deep ruts. We can repair even the deep well-worn ruts with: “Recognize (when a bad thought appears), stop, replace it with a healthier thought and then redirect,” a simple technique shared by my therapist.

Why isn’t everyone taught this in grade school through early adulthood? Parents often do this when training their children, so why aren’t more people doing this with their own thought pattern ruts? Try it with cancer. Instead of “cancer is going to kill me,” stop that thought, then substitute “I am getting through this cancer moment by moment.” Next, redirect yourself to another activity—anything that distracts you from depressing cancer thoughts.

Hold two conflicting ideas at the same time

Years ago, a therapist told me that one part of mental health is the ability to hold two conflicting, but true, ideas in your mind at the same time. I miss my dog who can never be replaced (she died from cancer) 

 I will eventually choose a new family dog member. I am grieving 

When we can take a breath and pause for a second, we have the glorious opportunity to choose not to repeat a mistake in our thoughts, words, or behaviors. We have a chance to speak or do kindlier and to break old hard-wired thought patterns.

When we keep in mind these techniques, we can be kinder to the people around us and even our pets during these difficult times, plus we can even be kinder to ourselves. Cancer patients and their caregivers definitely deserve that.

Adjusting to the unique holiday season amid the COVID-19 pandemic, all while going through treatment for cancer requires extra kindness and willingness to change some habits. Here are 4 tips to do just that.

4 Tips for Adjusting to Holidays Amid COVID-19 While in Treatment for Cancer

If you are pretty new in your cancer diagnosis, you may not be ready to consider what transitioning to “normal life” after treatment might look like. If you have recently completed your active treatment, you may be feeling a little relieved, but maybe even panicked.

As a ten-year-two-time cancer survivor, I will suggest that it can be helpful to think ahead a bit about this. Transitioning to “normal life” may not look like what you hope it will, but as I look back at myself as a 10-year survivor, here are six tips to keep in mind.

If you can extend your time off work, or negotiate a part-time work schedule to begin with, it will help your body and mind to heal. The physical, mental and emotional healing after a cancer diagnosis is usually better measured in months and years rather than days or weeks. It can help you to be gentler with yourself and not rush a return to “normal life” if you have a realistic timeframe at the start.

Let them know that you are not back to 100%. Even as my hair started to grow back after chemotherapy and I looked “normal,” I felt anything but normal. Looking normal and feeling normal may be different for a while, a long while, but you will get there. Do not be afraid to ask for patience and understanding from those around you.

Ongoing monitoring by you and your oncologist will help you to stay on top of your health and to feel safer. If a health concern pops up, don’t wait, and thereby torture yourself for a while. Instead, reach out to your doctor to determine if your health concern is cancer-related or not.

Repeat after me, “not everything is cancer.” You may also find it helpful to stay with an in-person or online support group for at least a few months (or years) after active treatment ends. When there is a place to go where people understand, it is less critical when those around you always understand your cancer experiences as you transition to “normal life”.

Though cancer took away your life for a period of time, you are in charge and it is your choice who you share your experience with and how much you share. You control your information. It might be helpful to form a plan before you are back in your normal daily life routine and interacting with family, friends, co-workers, and strangers.

Still, you are not alone in the transition back to normal life. I sort of want to say that if you can forget, then go for it. Unfortunately, ongoing responsible symptom monitoring and testing can contribute to ongoing worry for some of us. “New normal” (yes, I still hate that term) may include PTSD or fear of recurrence. Both of these are actually reasonable reactions to the abnormal circumstances of—well, you know, cancer. You will find your own way back to your new future, and you will find and appreciate joy and hope even more now.

Celebrate! Take a pre-back-to-normal vacation if you are able to do that. You are here!

Transitioning to normal life will have its challenges, but you will get through. I mean, heck, you have already beaten cancer! By comparison, these are just small bumps in the road.

It is time to recognize and appreciate how much you have grown during the cancer process. As my cancer support group leader once said, “There isn’t one of us who goes through cancer and doesn’t come out the other side smarter, wiser, and stronger than before.”

A 10 year, 2-time cancer survivor offers 6 tips for cancer survivors transitioning to "normal life" after their treatment for cancer wraps up.

Barbara Tako

How To Handle The Cold (And Heat) During and After Cancer

Lessons on Pet Cancer From a Cancer Survivor

4 Tips for Adjusting to Holidays Amid COVID-19 While in Treatment for Cancer

6 Tips On Transitioning to 'Normal Life' After Treatment For Cancer

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